Saturday, July 13, 2013

Sri Lankan Wedding

The past few days have been up and down. Let me start from one important story...

On Thursday I had woken up very early because I was excited for the wedding of a coworker here in Sri Lanka. My iPod was at 20% battery power and I was pretty nervous that it would die before the morning, thus not waking me up in time. I woke up slightly before my alarm went off, so I just got up and got ready for my day. Yamuna said she would help me pleat my saree, but I couldn't find her. One of the other matrons suggested to look upstairs. She was not there, but a group of women was. They offered to help me and dressed me appropriately. They all commented on how beautiful my saree was. I returned to my room and did my hair and got some earrings before heading over to the canteen for breakfast. The usual.

I headed straight over to Suwasetha, where the event was being held. Everyone was moving at a speed I'd never seen before... fast! There was a lot to do in order to get ready such as cook food, set up tables and put out decorations. By the time I got there (8:30) it was mostly done. I just sat down and waited for things to begin. It wasn't until I sat down was I told that the bride wasn't actually arriving until closer to 10:00. Dang. So I just sat around and visited with the girls there before the bride arrived.

She came in a white car and was wearing a beautiful white dress. She was covered in gold.. necklaces, headpieces, earrings, bracelets, you name it! Her name is Palika. She was raised in Suwasetha as an orphan. Today was the last day she would be in the center after 30 years! She looked stunning. She had threaded her whole body (like tweezing) and had beautiful hair and makeup. I hardly recognized her. She was smiling, yet you could see she was a little nervous. Everyone was telling her how beautiful she looked (myself included). She was dabbing her eyes and smiling.

Soon after, the groom arrived in a white car with 2 bridesmaids and 2 groomsmen. It looked packed in the car! He looked nice in just a regular black suit. They met up outside of the wedding hall and had a group of 4 young girls sing a song for them. Next, they proceeded inside the hall to sign the registry. Based on their astrological signs they find the best time to be married. This was it! They each had a witness to sign the documents. After saying some vows, they exchanged rings and he put a necklace on her. They lit a beautifully decorated oil lamp (standing about 4-5ft tall) and shared a small piece of cake among themselves and their wedding party. Next, they worship their elders... This basically means that they bow down to them to show respect. Kind of like you would with a monk. The ceremony was over.






Afterwards, tea and snacks were shared. There were a variety of oil cakes as well as some rice/coconut patties. This gave everyone a chance to eat, drink and mingle while the newly married couple got to have photos taken around Suwasetha. I followed around outside to take some pictures of my own, and I even got one with Palika and her groom. This took a bit over an hour. Afterwards, they came back inside and we were all welcomed to lunch which included rice and many curries as well as fruit cups and ice cream. I ate with my hands (as is the custom here) and cleaned up. I gave Palika a gift that I had bought. A pair of sparkling earrings for her and an iron for their household. She seemed flattered to receive it. I also spent time with the deaf girls taking pictures and hanging out. But I was hot and tired, so I returned to my room to change and have a nap. The rest of the day was nothing spectacular.





Yesterday I went to the library to look for books on the war to read for school. There was only one about the Tamil Tigers and their 'terrorist activities'. It was a very short book, including extremely graphic photos that made my stomach turn and one liners explaining the incidents that occurred. It was very disturbing and I'm not sure what to make of it yet. I can only assume it is very slanted, as not all Tamil people are bad. There were probably many Sinhalese people who committed the same brutal acts. I wish I could see both sides.

This prompted a discussion with Bandula about opportunities to work in the North... I believe this area was most affected by the war. Bandula said he would not send me with Sarvodaya because no one has good experiences. Security personnel become very suspicious and don't like to have outsiders in, apparently fearing what they may relay to the media or international realm. Bandula did say that I could go as a tourist with little problems, although I would not be able to go to villages or stay in a home stay. Purely holiday. While this wasn't the answer I wanted, I appreciated that Bandula isn't just sending me out there because I want to. He describes the risks to me and I respect that. I don't want to take chances or upset the security forces. At least I can go for a 'holiday', but secretly I will be looking for any signs of the war and the effect it has had on the people. I'm not encouraged to talk to people about it, but maybe if the opportunity arises...?

Yesterday I left Suwasetha early because I wasn't feeling so good. Very suddenly I was feeling exhausted, hot, nauseous and I had a headache. The nurse, Indika, suggested I go and rest. She also mentioned that she had a headache and vomited earlier in the day. Indika said it could be a change in weather. I don't know what that's supposed to mean because it's been the same weather every day, except yesterday there was no rain. Every day is high 30s or around 40. No surprises... Ever. So I went back to the hostel to rest. Indika walked me back and mentioned to the matrons that I was sick. Yamuna checked on me as did Maia and Chelsea. I was terrible. I was super hot, sweaty, tired, my headache was worse and now I was feeling ready to vomit. Yamuna said she'd come back at 7:00 and if I was still bad or worse we would go to the doctor. By 7:00 I knew things were getting worse so we went to the same doctor I went to see about my ant bites. He gave me amoxicillan, pills for heartburn (amox can cause heartburn), pills to help with the fever, and vitamins since I was so weak. He also gave me a referral to have a full blood count done and a dengue fever test done. Maia came with me which was super nice. She was like a mother, making sure everything was in order. I appreciated it. Yamuna was also there. The individuals who were waiting for the doctor let me cut in front of them. I think they saw how bad I was. I thanked them as we were leaving.

Before I went to the doctor, Maia and Chelsea went to the grocery store and picked me up some easy-to-eat snacks, including a baguette, crackers, apples, and ginger cookies. When I got home I ate part of an apple and took copious amounts of pills. Now my bum was very unhappy and my stomach was upset and couldn't decide if it needed to throw up or not. Still I managed ok. I was not feeling well enough to take a shower, despite the girls putting a plastic chair in there for me to sit on. I just was worried I'd pass out. I was so out of it. I went to bed shortly after.

My stomach was doing so many flip flops and felt so gross I could hardly sleep. I had the light on and the fan on full blast. In case I had to make an emergency trip to the bathroom I also left my door unlocked. I slept naked and was still warm. I was in and out of short sleeps until about 3:00 when I got on the computer and tried to tire out my eyes. I also took a gravol, hoping maybe I could be so tired that I'll forget about the pain and discomfort and fall asleep anyways. It worked, but I was exhausted when I was woken up at 6:45am. Time to go to get the blood test. Clinic opens at 7am.

I showered and got ready and just that alone was enough to totally drain me. It was quarter after 7 when we arrived. I was the only one in the clinic and got served right away. I do not like needles and it was so gross but I did it. I was to return at 12:00 noon to get my results. We went home, paid the driver, and I went to bed.

11:45 I was woken up again. Time to head back to the clinic and pick up my results. The same tuk tuk driver came back to get me. I picked up my little sheet with wacky numbers and codes on it from the clinic and went to the doctor I saw to get them interpreted and to also get his recommendation.  He said it was not dengue fever and that my blood count was ok. He advised that I continue with the pills he gave me and I should feel better. I already was.

I have eaten an apple, part of the baguette and some ginger cookies in the last 26 hours. I know it's not a lot. But it's all I can handle. I am also trying to drink a lot of water... I know my body needs fuel. As of right now I am hot and weak... But still I am feeling better. The nausea is gone, which has allowed me to eat. This is good. I hope things improve exponentially from here.

I have an opportunity to travel with Shanti Sena (Peace Brigade) to Anuradhapura for training. They leave early on Monday morning and return around midnight on Wednesday. I really want to go, but I'm just worried about my health. The drive is long and would give me an opportunity to sleep but at the same time traveling is so exhausting... Do I want to risk it if I'm not 100%? Does anyone have any thoughts?

I forgot to mention that when I was in Hikkaduwa I learned more about the tsunami in 2004. Can you believe that the wave reached over 10meters high and went inland about 4kms! That is a ton of destruction. Along the coast, towns are littered with gravestones.

I think that's all for now!


2 comments:

  1. Wow Laura, so sorry to hear your weren't well. I was quite ill myself with singles and just now getting back into checking things online. Sorry I haven't written again until now.
    It sounds as though you've really settle in and are surrounded by some very nice, kind people. I'm so glad, the first little while when you arrive in strange new places and cultures it's always difficult until you get over the travel lag and get acclimated. It sounds like you've had some wonderful adventures and I love hearing about them. The time will start to fly by soon and before you know it you'll be heading home.
    We'll have to get together for lunch with your Auntie Nean and your mum when I come to Winnipeg, I'd love to chat with you about your experiences and perhaps trade stories and compare our different experiences.
    Well you take care, stay healthy and stay safe.

    Jean

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    1. Hi Jean,
      Thank you so much for your kind reply. I'm really hoping your shingles is much better, if not gone, by now. I can't imagine how painful it must be.
      I have settled in finally I think... I've even found myself calling the hostel 'home' a couple times. Now that there are many volunteers here it's much easier and I have a lot more support. I have hit the half way point last week... I think time will go by much more quickly now.
      I'd love to get together for lunch sometime! I come home at the end of August! Talk soon,

      Laura

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